Him

Every girl always wishes, dreams, and hopes for that perfect ideal guy they can spend the rest of their lives with. "I want a guy who's sensitive, smart, great at singing, respectful, honest, prefers spending time with me most of the time, etc.." Hah, the typical sentence most girls would say but can never find... or what's even worse they would compare that perfect ideal guy or a great friend of theirs to their current boyfriend. Funny how trying to find this certain happiness or love works.

I admit, I have gone through days in settling for someone because I was afraid that was the best I would get and I was afraid that no one else would want me. But one thing I noticed is that I never tried. I've been asking and praying to God to give me such a great guy and the funny thing is that he has, its just now my turn to try. He answered my prayers no doubt, now it was my turn to make use of what He sent me and actually start trying.

And you know even after the rough start I had.. I finally found him.

Now I just hope that its going to last but whatever the road leads us, I know the connection and strong bond we have will never be broken and I promise you that.

His Goodnight Texts always know how to make me smile:

"Hey babe. It was really nice talking as always. I hate being the one to always leave you :/ I swear you can go on forever without any sleep. But yeah excited for OUR year like no other already. Disneyland, your birthday, clubbing, your family and most of all YOU! :) But yeah I miss you a lot and maybe that's why it's so hard to say goodnight and leave you from a great talk. Curse my sleep cycle. Lol but yeah I really miss you babe and I can't wait til these 10 days are over. I care about you so much:) Please try to get some sleep please I don't want you to get sick. Goodnight babe<3"

"You're my baby"

".. But yeah babe, I mean everything I tell you every night. I don't usually open up to anyone as much as I do with you and I'm very happy to know that you're there for me. Just know I'm here for you too and I want you to be able to count on me for anything that's troubling you. You're very special in so many ways and I'm just grateful to be at least your friend. But I'm even more grateful that you gave me the chance to be with you knowing how many times I disappoint you. But I'll try my best to avoid having that happen because you mean way to much to me to see you upset. I just want to see you happy as always. Like I said, as long as you're fine, I'll be fine. So I hope you're fine right now, and I want you to head to sleep as soon as possible. I want you to be healthy as can be. Take care babe and goodnight<3 You're my one and only and I promise you that."

-Christopher E. Oka

Yeah, God sent me a special one. <3>

Goodbye 2010

Its been a good year (:

[x] Graduated Holy Family High School Class of 2010
[x] Gradnite
[x] My 18th Debut
[x] Spent Summer in L.A w/ Summer Group (Siblings, Ronnel, Ryna, Cristin, Mark)
[x] Senior Prom : SFHS w/ Chris Garcia & HFHS w/ Francis Nepomuceno
[x] First time working the Vote Poll
[x] Scandinavia & Finland Tour w/ LACC
[x] Last LACC Concerts
[x] Went off to UC Merced
[x] Experience College Parties
[x] Friendship Games
[x] Made new friends
[x] Saddle Ranch
[x] Disneyland w/ Kuya Maynard & Ate Gigi & Ate Kai
[x] Six Flags w/ couple of my debut court
[x] Cousin's "Spiritual" Retreat (;
[x] Ate Christine Pregnant
[x] Spent time w/ friends especially Shalley
[x] Real World Merced Crew (: [Bryan, Chris, Ryan, Ryna, Steph, Jessica)
[x] a Disappointed Semester of college ! HAHAHA
[x] Pulled 3-4 All Nighters
[x] Clubbing w/ the Girls
[x] Cue Adventures, Sonic Adventures
[x] On the road back to Merced Adventures
[x] Movie Nights
[x] Picnics w/ Summer Group
[x] Got my license (:

Thank you Lord for this safe and blessed year. <3

Fall Semster of College

Now I haven't been on blogspot in a real long time.
Unlike tumblr, blogspot is a website that I would consider as my personal journal: talking about my life, releasing my intermix emotions, writing unforgettable memories.. etc.

And here's one to start of with : Finishing my first fall semester at UCM.
I came school with the mindset of going to the library, studying, meeting new friends, and enjoying life on my own.
Hah, now as I take on my last final, all i could really say is that this fall semester was a learning experience in shaping the life and the person I want to be. Don't get me wrong, my first semester was amazing: meeting new friends, Real World Merced Adventures, having those random talks in our room, realizing my limits with the social life, experiencing the highs and lows of friendship as well as your crush etc ... However, if I were to choose if I can redo my first semester all over again, I would absolutely say YES. Why? Well I'm happy with the things I have here however my study habits seem to be one of the things that worried and stressed me out the most. College isn't a joke, most people think its all fun and games but honestly.. Its serious business. After taking that Chem final that I hate with so much passion now, I just look back throughout the semester and blame myself thinking I could've done better. I remember when I first went to orientation and one of the professors here made a big speech about Failing and honestly he's right. "Don't be afraid to fail" I learn to accept that I have made the mistakes that has caused me to feel disappointed in myself but if I never made those mistakes then maybe in the long run.. I would be sorry.. Things happen for a reason and I just have to keep moving on. I have so many people supporting me (parents, friends) that I know I can do it and guess what I WILL. My next semester will be a new me and to prove it, I'm going to write about it onceI hit those last spring finals. WATCH ME. I guess writing all my feelings is a motivation for me to change my study habits and start realizing life and how its not as perfect and easy as I had it during all elementary and high school. Its time for me to show who I am and give my all.

Lord, I want to take this opportunity first to say thank you for blessing me with such amazing people that helped me throughout all the struggles I've faced. I know our relationship with each other have been on and off and starting this year, I am going to try to make you proud Lord. I love you and I will always have faith in you. You are my strength and I personally apologize for everything I've done to have hurt you. It is my fault and I'm sorry. Please continue to give me the guidance and strength I need to make it. I love you Lord and I'm sorry again.

Spring Semester. Its going to be different.

Time to Recap

So I really do not remember the specific date however I just feel like reminiscing about things because it makes me smile everytime I think about it.

Basically, My boypren came early one Saturday and we decided to go out & eat food since my debut court were coming and stuff later that day. So we went to THE HABIT and there this one particular person that brighten up our day.

I was, (like always) having an argument with Albert and I was getting so frustrated and tired of it that it seemed to affect me as a person. So when Ryna & I decided to go to the Habit to get some food I must admit that my day just got better. Despite having the food we wanted one of the ladies who worked there was so nice & considerate about us that it brighten up both of our days. Her thoughtfulness in helping with carrying the food and her politeness just seem to make our day turn from bad to GREAT. It sucks that I wasn't able to get her name but the way she greeted and helped us showed how much of an affect a person can do to you and how a simple smile can help make our day turn completely around.

We were so high in spirits that nothing seemed to bring us down although Albert totally did later that night but whatever. But anyway, I can't help but feel so high up in spirits when I think about her and the court even made it more special. Lol Franics & Kevin with their dumb skits sometimes I swear can surely make you cheese it.

SMILE IT HELPS MAKE PEOPLE FEEEL GOOOOOD

An Unforgetable Friday :D

Febraury 12, 2010

So right after school, I had a small practice for my hip-hop routine with Caitlin, Kevin, Tiffany & my Older Brother. We decided to have a spontaneous Friday so I decided to call my besterestest Kyle Medina to hang out with us. So he drove us around and I must admit he was a pretty good driver :D

We went to Forever 21, then Urban and then off to our adventure to pop our Sonics cherry ! Ohh maaaan. Did we get lost. First we went to La Canada to show Tiffany SFHS and then we were follwoing the directions of Francis to help us get there but did we have trouble. We ended up at the Rose Bowl & then later on we eneded up hitting many Dead Ends. Haha Whatever it was kinda funny. But after a good one hour we finally reached our destination and we were all CONENT (:

Why? Well besides experiencing our first Sonic Burgers and shakes. Kyle & my little brother was able to get their hot waitress rollerskating away (Steph) and Tiffany & I got our cute boy server (Danny). LOL He's mine by the way Tiffany but whatever.

It was a Friday well spent. :D

Thinking about my life.

Thinking about my life...
Its January 2nd, 10:35 p.m & I'm sitting on my bed, my back against the dashboard and writing here on blogspot.
Memories, different emotions, start to overtake me. Why am I feeling like this?
I have a lot to do, but as usual I'm lazy to start on it yet I have this feeling inside of me that I can't just explain.
Its not stressful, happy, excitement, nor sad but a mix of emotions. I honestly don't know why I'm feeling like this.
After reading my twinnie's tumbler & listening to the song "someone" I guess I feel as if I'm missing something, someone more like it..

Take my time..
Take it slow..
One day I'll realize that all my waiting is worth it..

My twinnine says it all...

Every girl needs a man; the kind that will treat you right as well as others; the kind that has enough respect for himself, family, and others; the one that will change for you to just be with you. The kind that searches for you with his heart, the kind that can be trusted alone with a room full of many other beautiful ladies, the kind that won’t cheat on you cause he knows he’s got all he wants and needs already, the kind that’s willing to be your friend and lover, the kind that doesn’t mind calling early in the morning to say good morning and late at night to say good night; maybe even sing you a good morning and tell you a good night story or talk to you until you fall asleep. That kind that will do anything for you, even if it’s just to buy your favorite kind of candy. The kind that will defend and fight for you, the kind that won’t ditch you for his friends when you need him the most, the kind that won’t leave you lonely and wondering. The kind that isn’t afraid to smile to his friends every time you’re around and tell them, “She’s the one.” The kind that appreciates you for the things to do for him, even if they’re small gestures. The kind that actually thanks you for the little love notes you leave him, the kind that is willing to wait for you when you’re falling behind, the kind that will actually open the door for you, take you out on dates once in a while and buy you flowers cause it’s a Wednesday. The kind that notices your hair when you just got it cut or done beautifully for him, the kind that reminds you that he loves you and that he’s happy with you in case you forget. The kind that kisses your forehead when you’re down, the kind that tells you to be strong and not to cry, the kind that will go through thick and thin with, and for you, the kind that just loves you for who you are. That kind of man, that’s the kind you keep.